Friday, January 6, 2017

i just don't know where i can be found


i'm looking at job openings and i can already feel my chest tighten prematurely at the thought of meeting new people

i looked at xxx's and xxxxxx's tumblrs from when they were 21/22 and they were exactly the way i am at this very moment, idealistic and excited and eager to overshare, but it's still so them, the essence of them i mean, and it got me thinking about how someday i'll be 27 and the virtual world i live in, this safe space i've always had, will be vastly different and i'll be different too

i don't know how i feel about that

i'm scared i'll stop being this vocal about the things i love and i'm scared i'll stop caring about them altogether

a couple weeks ago i found out about an artist called bunny rogers and she wrote this


and like same

maybe i should get a job at phoenix publishing house because it's so close by and maybe i'll get a meghan daum/joanna rakoff-esque essay out of it

i keep reminding myself that christina kelly, definitive sassy magazine writer and ellegirl editor-in-chief, started out at footwear news

i'm about to watch and cry to titanic for the second night in a row

every so often i become obsessed with the histories of shipwrecks

2008 was the year i started becoming who i am now and i think i've always used it to measure the passage of time and this year it hit me just how short, and just how long, a decade actually is

in fact we're three years away from a whole new decade think about that